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i rock too fast for .love.


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October 23 / 12:23 pm

July 11 / 06:38 pm

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add me&i'll add you back




- [Friday
July 08 / 03:25 pm
[ mood | worried ]


i might sleep over Jaime's.
we went to her old neighboorhood awhile ago.
there was a pink bunny.
3 / +

-alone with you, alone with me- [Friday
July 08 / 09:56 am
[ mood | upset ]

i have been in a horible mood this week.
mainly because this is the worst week ever.

MONDAY: of course i had to work. that was bad because my cousin Frank was at my grandparents. this day being one of the last times i would get to see him before he left for marines/Iraq. AND AND, i got hit on by some 26 year old. which made me feel very awkward and scared and apparently this sitation caused a commotion with management- i later foudn out. after work, i was driving to my grandparents and i got lost in lindenwald. but i ended up on the right track. so, before i got in i txted Joey to call me later, because i needed to talk to him about what happened. the family thing was good. i realized how close me and Frank are and i will miss him a lot. so, later that night we caught a few fireworks. nothing great. Joey didn't call until 1, and i was asleep. totally defeated the purpose.

TUESDAY: no word from Joey, feel gross because of monday's work situation.

WEDNESDAY: talked to Mike about somehting completely random. something about a show on friday and clarissa going. didn't think about it too much. still ew, and haven't talked to Joey.

THURSDAY: Mike tells me that he and CLarissa are going out. i was shocked to hear that- and upset. i mean, me and Mike aren't togeter now or anything. but when he was with that Erinne girl, he talked about missing me, and still loving me, etc, etc. and i thought he was actually telling the honest truth. until i hear this. obviously he and Erinne broke up, and now he goes out with CLARISSA?! i don't get it at all. i mean, its not like they live near each other or know each other at all. but whatever, i mean this has been the cherry on a great week. its not that i am in love with Mike again, its just we have been through a lot, and i thought he understood that. and i thought i mentioned him to Clarissa numerous times, so i didn't think she'd do something like that. i guess i was wrong. its not like i am bent on breaking them up, its just i think of things that could go down. i am not going to be shy about it, mike was my first real boyfriend, my first kiss. so he is the guy that i hold close to me and will always love in some way, no matter who i talk to or what. so, Mike, if you read this i am not going to expect you know what i mean, because i am a fickle girl, this is not some plea to get you to break up with her. this is me and my thoughts and feelings. nothing more, nothing less.

i haven't hear from Joey at all, except for that one time.
i really did want to talk to him about what happened to me.
i mean, i HAVE to talk to someone...

ps. i have lots of pictures to upload.

1 / +

June 29 / 08:11 pm

hi, i desperatly want straight hair.

6 / +

-we stand alone, under fictious skies- [Saturday
June 25 / 08:48 pm
[ mood | hot ]

i had a bad dream last night.
&i miss him.


-wheres all you're passion gone?- [Thursday
June 23 / 02:10 pm
[ mood | chill ]


i think that is a really sweet picture. i took it when Jaime and i went down the shore and whatnot. anway, yesterday i bought a pair of jeans, which were desperatly needed. i was supposed to go see Joey last night. my dad decided to kill my pans. instead, i went for a long walk, took a cold shower and watched Ever After. i thought that movie had vanished for life, but Giuliana found in. so, exciting. later on i found out that i now do have a car, but insurance is really high and my parents were thinking about what to do, either keep the car(with the $$$insurance) or just sell the car. it was an excellent morning, i slept until 11:03. after i got downstairs, my mom showed me my new plates and told me we were keeping the car, under my dad's name. relief and no excitment. he is going to take the car to my uncle's in PA and he's going to buff it up and then my padre is going to check it out and providing all is ok, its mine. i drove Giuliana and Francesca to the park, and i felt like a good older sister. now i am home, listening to music and thinking about this one kid who continually says all this stuff to me and then i see things and it is all so contradictory. whatever. i want to go somewhere.LOVELOVELOVE.


-knock me down and i'll get up again- [Monday
June 20 / 07:56 pm
[ mood | eh ]

i saw Joey last night.
i had really bad headaches at work today.

&&bands: stevenlemon,dayslikethese, dontlookdown,RUFIO
Where: Eugenes in Vineland
Doors open at 6:30

2 / +

-shes got a whole lot of reasons- [Friday
June 17 / 03:26 pm
[ mood | bored ]

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

i spent monday and tuesday down in OC, sea isle and strathmere.

it was grand. i LOVE the beach.

i need to get my summer reading!

i've talked to Joey.


1 / +

-this storys old but it goes on an on until we disappear- [Saturday
June 11 / 08:30 pm
[ mood | chill ]

school is DONE.
finally. gosh, this year went by so fast.

i need time away from my class.
everyone was getting pissed at each other.

finals weren't that bad.
hopefully i'll get second honors.

i got a new job at a club house with a pool.
gate check, holla.
i went in today, its deffinatly not that bad.
so i will have full time there, not sure what days yet.
this is good because now i have a sweet excuse to
not work as much at the restraunt.

besides that, i missed going to the beach friday.
and i was supposed to see Joey tonight, but he is going surfing.

so i get another night alone, home with my family.
i might try to go to a park and hit up the swings.
thats always fun.

i have just decided i like Jack Johnson.
he is super good, and i guess i was stupid to not like him
because he reminded me of someone...

anyway, lovelovelove

how are you all doing?

1 / +

May 29 / 03:32 pm

i love love love pita chips.

-this will change anything- [Sunday
May 29 / 12:27 pm
[ mood | thirsty ]

so, today is my sisters birthday party.
that means family, food, poker/blackjack AND cake.
i forgot that there is a show at Mike's today or something.
i doubt i am going.
last night Nick called, we'll eventaully hang out.
haven't heard from Joey.
&&i made dos new bracelets last night.
they are sweet.



-the california sun cascading down my face- [Saturday
May 28 / 03:09 pm
[ mood | hungry ]

yesterday was Emily Fral.'s party. it was pretty fun. it was me, Jaime, Jill, Gina, Emily Rap., Emily Fral., Shannon and eventually Pinky. me, Jaime and Jill came late, after a track meet that i couldn't participate in. i saw Jess John though, she is super nice and we talked for alittle, the girls jumped then we left. we stopped at Jaime's to change, and i forgot my jeans broken button issue. so i had to wear shorts. and Jill said i looked like some sufer chick. which is amusing because i have never surfed in my life. anway, we got to Emily's and oh, the food. it was all so good. i love food, and i eat too much of it. whatever though. so we ate, then we all hung out with her brother who is a beast at DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION.  cake was excellent, funfetti and Jill's fruit coblerish thing. fiesta. we eneded up watching mean girls. halfway though, Joey called. we talked for alittle, so that was cool. after the movie, Jaime and Gina fell asleep. then me Emily Rap. and Fral, Jill, Pinky, and sometimes Shannon had girl talk. that was intresting but its good to talk. i am caught up to date with everything. Mike Z. called (Fral.'s lover) and he had a conversation with everyone. he knew my last name and i still don't know how but it was awesome. so after the call, we continused the conversation. it was an awesome time. this morning i left with Gina, Shannon, and Emily Rap., Gina took me to school and madre took me home. i think we are going out later, i need to get jeans and some books. so coool. ah, more food.


1 / +

-you said its dangerous to be so intimate- [Wednesday
May 25 / 06:24 pm
[ mood | upset ]

shannon + bad news = me(nervous wreck)
i do not know what to think because everytime i try to rationalize, it back fires and everything becomes negitive again. it really sucks, a lot. i thought it could have been different this time. i honestly did, does that make me stupid? i really did think people changed. then i realized that people don't change, its the situation that changes. i have no idea how is going to explain himself OR if he will even tell me himself. that parts makes me sad becuse i thought i could trust him to do that. maybe i can't... but i was ready for a change, and now i am thinking maybe i am not as ready as i thought. the only thing i am certain of is the horible feeling in the pit of my stomach.



-like eating glass- [Tuesday
May 24 / 09:49 pm
[ mood | okay ]

i'm stoaked about it.

the doctors took my stiches out.
the one on my arm looks fairly decent.
the ones on my chest area, don't look good at all.
when the lady was cutting them out, she like, pulled the skin apart again
so its an open wound again!

AND it hurts a lot.
messed up!

ps. he called me babe.

2 / +

-the glove compartment is inaccuratly name- [Sunday
May 22 / 07:45 pm
[ mood | calm ]

license tomorrow at 2:30. exciting. all my papers are done, as is the rest of my homework. its a pretty good feeling, to have everything done. my stiches itch and the one still hurts a lot. its gross.

i am waiting for you to flee the scene
as if you held in your hand the smoking gun
and on the floor lay the one you said you loved.(expo `86)

post script;; pictures are fun BUT embarasssing

make it electricCollapse )


May 22 / 07:27 pm

Describe yourself using one band and song titles from that band

Created by naw5689 and taken 27714 times on bzoink!

Choose a band/artist and answer only in song TITLES by that band:Death Cab for Cutie
Are you male or female:technicolor girls
Describe yourself:i was a kaleidoscope
How do some people feel about you:the sound of settling
How do you feel about yourself:fake frowns
Describe your ex girlfriend/boyfriend:blacking out the friction
Describe your current girlfriend/boyfriend:all is full of love
Describe where you want to be:coney island
Describe what you want to be:president of what?
Describe how you live:we laugh indoors
Describe how you love:a movie script ending
Share a few words of wisdomwe looked like giants

Create a Survey | Search Surveys | Go to bzoink!


-all i wanna do, is stop thinking of you- [Wednesday
May 18 / 07:15 pm
[ mood | sore ]

here is what happened last night;;
well, i was running at school last night, after a track meet and the hall way was dark, so i got scared, thats why i ran, but i triped and at the end of the hall are 2 doors with glass pannals. and well, i trip and to catch my self i put my arms up and my left arm went through the glass.

in the end;;
cut up arm
six in my arm
seven above my left ribs
there was a piece of glass stuck in me!
it was outta control, blood everywhere, i passed out for a few minutes, went white and all.

it hurts when i laugh/sit up/laydown/stand up. so blah.

6 / +

-but she didn't mean a thing to me- [Wednesday
May 18 / 08:57 am
[ mood | rushed ]

so, in the last couple days i have:

-rode home with Joey
-broke a glass door pannal with my arm
-got really bloody
-rode in an ambulance for the first time
AND got 11 stiches or "sutures"
oh man

BUT; i saw my dad!
he is doing really well.

3 / +

-oh, inconsistant me crying out for consistancy- [Sunday
May 15 / 02:32 pm
[ mood | sad ]

so a lot has gone on. this weekend was a blur. thursday was the junior class retreat. it was okay i suppose. not as 'retreaty' as i thought it would be. but its all good. after that i went home with Jaime and we ate at some restraunt, the Toad Fish. it was good. then, friday night i ended up going to a show with jaime at the diner. the same one i went to last weekend to see Joey's band and a few others. they were all pretty good. i really like ISLE OF VIEW. so, cool. there was alittle drama with my dad about the reason i brought a bag. i was supposed to get a ride home from Joey, but incase he couldn't, i could sleepover Jaime's because we had track the next morning and mom had a funeral. so Joey can take me home and pick me up for track the next day, but i felt bad and in the end i ended up going back to Jaime's. saturday's track pratice was oaky. states is coming up and that is eh. i hope i am in them because coach was saying i mgiht not be?! i am not that good, but still; whatever. after pratice me and Jaime went to get her new phone which is quite sweet, camera and all. then we leave, get gas and food at wawa. go back to my house do some homework and then get ready for the show at the American Legion. we missed Anthony's band, saved by grace. but its oaky. we did get to see TAKING SIDES, DOWNWARD BOUND and ISLE OF VIEW. me and jaime went outside periodically for air and the one time the guitarist of IOV came and we all talked. it was fun. then he took us to show the bathrooms because i couldn't find them, so that was super nice. and when jaime was in there, he asked if i was sticking around to talk later and whatnot. and of course we were, so he said awesome or soemthing to that effect. so, i ended up buying their demo and a shirt. we all took a picture. i like them, Nik(the one we talked to) and Tim. super sweet and gave us hugs, it was a p a r t y! their CD is coming out JUNE 28, so buy it. its good stuff. of course, there was drama at the Legion. Arielle, Jablonski and Jen were there. stares the whole time. not just from them, but from Tim (Lacey) too! whatever. i did see the three of them storm out and Joey talk to Jablonski, so that was comforting. blah. i did see Matt Stags. he came over and was like, oh i saw you and i got excited! gotta love him. he gave me a hug then went off to set up or whatnot. then, today, was the bad news. dad is in the hospital for a week. i won't say why yet. but if possible, please pray for him? thank you.

post script; i feel like there is something going on with Joey and he isn't telling me which isn't good because this feeling i have now is always followed by something bad...

post post script;

Jaime and ICollapse )

2 / +

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